Inner Children Follow Up | Ep 7

Today Keith and Megan Peeler talk more about the idea of inner children. They share their personal stories and insights about how praying through your inner child can bring restoration and transformation. They will also model some inner healing prayer that you can do at home. We recommend Deep Wounds Deep Healing by Dr. Charles Kraft as a supplement to this conversation. You can find the link on our website: www.everfree.us/resources

Transcript

Hey everybody, welcome to the Everfree podcast.

My name is Keith Peeler and I'm here with my amazing wife, Megan Peeler, and we are all about prayer, aren't we? 

We really are.

And the purpose of the Everfree podcast is to be naturally supernatural as we share stories, biblical principles, concepts, and tools that are going to help you find freedom in your relationship with Christ.

Hey, welcome to episode follow up on inner children.

Today, Megan and I are discussing our thoughts and our follow up to our conversation with Dr. Scott Hamilton.

Well, hey, welcome back to the Everfree podcast.

We are going to do a follow up today and talk more about the idea of inner children.

As we've had comments from the last podcast and we've thought more about this, we thought it'd just be a good way to have a deeper conversation, talk about more things that we've experienced and what we're talking about in inner healing prayer.

As we have had our own prayer with actually recently in the last two weeks, we've each gone to some mentors for some inner healing prayer for ourselves and have gone to those childhood memory kind of things.

As people are listening and people are kind of responding to that podcast with Dr. Hamilton, what would you want to start talking about again in regards to inner children? 

When we ask people to remember a time when they were five years old, six years old, seven elementary school years, typically people can remember them being back in grade school or them moving to a new house.

And so we are asking that adult person who is 40 years old to go back and remember those times and basically remember when they were a little child and then inviting Jesus into those moments where there might need to be some healing.

Right.

And I think it's fascinating.

I mean, I was so encouraged by Dr. Hamilton because of his practical and his...

He's been both a minister and a psychologist for years and recognizing that we as humans, right, as Christians specifically, are both natural and supernatural beings.

And the natural part of that was Dr.Hamilton's experience and he's seen that crossover from his spiritual Christian world and pastoral leadership, but then also for us to be able to walk this out in an honest way with people where we can really kind of take a look in the mirror and go, oh my gosh, I'm normal.

I'm thinking of the conversation we had with a prayer appointment yesterday where we're getting to the bottom of some intimacy issues for a person.

And that person was talking about some very private things that when they were a child, they had.

And we reflected with that person.

It was a dear friend.

And we talked about what it means to be vulnerable.

And she was sharing with us some very vulnerable memories.

And I could read the expression on her face as we were praying with her.

And you could tell, right? 

She kind of had this, oh my gosh, should I say this? 

What are they gonna think of me if I say this? 

Is this okay? 

And then when she shared what she was talking about, and because of our prayer experience and our own ministry and life experience, we kind of looked at her and said, hey, you're normal.

What you're talking about is a normal part of life.

And you know, it's interesting because when you think about this little girl that was going through some stuff, in the beginning, I kind of thought it was weird.

Are there any inner children or little versions of yourself that need attention? 

Yeah, when we started doing to pray like this.

And so it's been interesting to see how helpful of a tool that it is when we pray.

And we say, just imagine yourself as that three, four, five year old little child.

And we're not, we're just gonna go and visit that child and minister to her.

Yeah.

And to see the breakthrough and the realization of where the enemy was at work.

And also where Jesus was.

Yeah.

It's just a very powerful tool.

It is.

And the concept that we always go with is there's always more.

So even this week, you know, our family's going through a lot of stuff right now.

And I needed some help.

And I needed to kind of get my head right about some things and kind of go, okay, where's the enemy messing with me? 

Where am I under attack? 

Where am I just needing to correct my thinking? 

And where do I need to just get my, you know, my life in order from a prayer, from a father, from a work, from a everything standpoint.

And sure enough, you know, my mentor, as he's leading me through prayer, he words it differently, but the concept is still the same.

And what came up is some significant time in my life where some fear and some anger was a part of a family interaction that I had.

And as he led me through that, he said, okay, and just like we've talked about on previous podcasts of how do you visualize or hear or see your sense Jesus being present.

And I recalled a memory from my family.

And as I recalled that memory from my family, it was, okay, where is Jesus meeting you in that? And it brought me back to that place of more inner healing.

How old were you when that happened? 

Oh, gosh.

It was in the junior high-ish age, right? 

So you were visualizing yourself as a junior high school kind of kid? 

Absolutely.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And the fascinating thing was, as I did that, my son and I, the day before, were laying on the couch snuggling, right? 

And I'm just kind of loving on him.

And it's just really fun kind of connecting intimate, playful.

He's kind of rubbing my arm.

I'm rubbing his back and we're laying there.

And as my mentor prayed and said, okay, where do you see Jesus meeting you? And I visualized it and I was a junior high kid, a little bit older than my son is right now.

And I just saw Jesus.

That was the first thing that Jesus was laying with me on the couch, rubbing my back, running his fingers through my hair.

And that was the picture that I got.

There was this soothing part of it.

And then my mentor said, okay, now, Keith, adult Keith, what do you want to say to that little boy? 

And I just basically was able to encourage him, like, hey, it's going to be okay.

What you're dealing with right now, it goes away.

It's not as bad as you think it is because I have adult perspective.

And at first, I think like you, like the idea, like, whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on.

Am I some sort of nut job? 

But the way Dr. Hamilton fleshed it out for us last week, no, this is what normal people do.

And it's also a way to deal with the lies that come back to your adult Keith version that says, oh, remember what happened in junior high? 

That lie just keeps coming back in different ways, different triggers.

But when you deal with that intimate connection with Jesus and junior high version of yourself, and then he ministers to you, you're grown up and you don't have to deal with those lies anymore.

They're exposed.

Yeah.

And it helps you, helps me even yesterday process the difference between my intellect, my emotional maturity that I am as a 46 year old male as I'm podcasting today.

You know, teenager or young junior high-ish age Keith did not have the mental, emotional language for that.

But I can now reflect on that.

And I can now visualize and I can recognize that Christ was with me there.

And so how does Christ want to reconcile and redeem what has happened to me to show me what really happens in the future? 

You know, I'm kind of looking back and reflecting and praying over those things.

And again, you know, as our listeners are growing up there, as you're coming to this, the whole of this is about intimacy with God.

And intimacy with each other comes out of that, right? 

So the more vulnerable, Megan, that I am with you, the more you know me, the more you accept me, the more you have to maybe forgive me, right, as we've done this in our marriage, coming up on 15 years this summer.

And that intimacy has grown not only in our physical intimacy and spiritual intimacy, but this healing intimacy of doing this together as a married couple.

But I also want to say to you out there, if you are in a marriage where you're not on the same page, I just want to bless you and encourage you that that is okay.

It's interesting because sometimes people will say to us, oh, you're just so lucky that you and your wife get to do this.

And I agree.

I am.

We are.

We are so lucky that we get to do this together.

But that doesn't mean that our marriage is any better or worse than yours.

We have stuff.

We have lots of stuff, especially the season of our life.

But I do feel so blessed that we have grown so much over the last 10 years of our process of healing and deliverance so that we can share this ministry together.

Well, and again, it has been a process.

This did not just land on us.

We're like, oh yeah, we can do this together.

I saw gifts in you for ministry long before you did.

That's true.

That's true.

And I knew it was coming.

I didn't know how, but I had to wait for it.

And similarly, you saw brokenness in me that needed God's healing touch, and it took time.

And so over the years, as we've progressed, what we want to encourage you about in your marriage, since we're kind of taking this tangent, is this.

Intimacy with God will also grow your intimacy with your spouse.

Now, some marriages don't feel safe, and we encourage you to either get a professional counselor in that environment, or you can call us, or you can call pastors, or like, how do you walk that out with your spouse daily? 

That's a coaching, training, maybe counseling.

Yeah, a good counselor, marriage counselor would be the best avenue for that kind of help.

But experientially, pastorally, you can get that care as well.

But walking that out and engaging your spouse more and more every day.

The more you trust and reveal yourself to your spouse, the more they're going to trust and reveal themselves to you.

Now, if you're having trouble communicating those things, that's where the professional counselor can help you learn to do that.

We had great counseling in the beginning of our marriage that really set a foundation for how we're communicating.

And it's not been easy, necessarily, but it has grown over time.

All right, enough of that tangent on the whole marriage thing, but I felt like it was important because, especially as we're doing the podcast, we're hearing more of this, and I wanted to address it and bless you.

Whether you're struggling in your marriage with your faith or not, God is with you and growing intimacy in your marriage and relationship.

So as we're progressing in this conversation about inner healing and inner children, for me yesterday, it was like, wow, really, Lord? 

There's more? 

And as it did lead to more, it led me to generational things.

More generational things were coming up in prayer, and the anger that I've been experiencing, and the depression, and the struggles around some current stuff that's going on was like, yeah, I've got...

huh, that's linked to even more generational stuff in the past.

So that process of just walking it out was taking another layer of that intimacy off and walking that out.

And I was exhausted yesterday.

I mean, I'm a little bit sick today as part of it, but it was exhausting because I realized, wow, there's just so much more that God can do and heal in my life.

And I just want to be more intimate with God.

I want to be more honest about what I'm struggling with, and I'll be more honest with you as my spouse, you know? 

And we're pretty wide open right now, but all of this is about drawing us into a deeper place in Him.

As you, babe, have thought about different people with inner children, is there any issue that you think pops up more than another with inner children that you think is worth noting? 

I think that when we pray with people that have been extremely traumatized as a young child, it can be overwhelming for that person to imagine themselves as a five-year-old being sexually abused or hurt in any way.

And so typically, if it's that intense of a trauma, then we will step away from them imagining being three or four or five years old, and we will ask them to put a picture on a wall of them being that age so that they don't have to step back into it.

But there have been times when we've prayed for people and their voices change, and they really do imagine themselves as that five-year-old.

And that five-year-old needs a lot of attention, and it's an inner child that's been holding a lot of the pain.

And a lot of times what's happening when that little five-year-old is holding all that pain is they're basically doing the job of Jesus.

They're holding on and controlling all this stuff so they can keep it together, and they don't know how to give it to Jesus.

They don't know how to give that pain to Jesus.

They don't know how to trust Him.

And so we gently walk that out.

And typically, when we're praying for that five-year-old traumatized child, that child is exhausted.

They are so tired because they've been carrying such a load.

And as an adult version of themselves, you know, they get exhausted all the time because they just remember all the time the trigger will come and they will remember the trauma, and it'll pull them back in.

And so it's just this tug of war, and it's the inability to be set free when that little five-year-old's still in trauma.

Yeah, and it's the idea that Jesus really can heal.

Jesus really can touch this wound and take the pain, and that's what we always do.

We try to hold it, but Jesus, that's His job.

Yeah, and you know, Jesus can't change what happened to that five-year-old child.

Jesus can't change the history, but He can change the way the person receives the information and the way that the person hears it.

He can expose truth to the lie that helps the person just kind of give it over to Him.

But the trauma is still the trauma.

He's just the mighty healer that comes in to address the trauma.

Yeah, and when that inner child, you know, from the psychological perspective, as Dr. Hamilton was mentioning, that that person is connected to that kind of voice.

And one of the voices he talked about was, you know, the critical, you know, either mother, father, figure, or critical person as a leader in their life, that anytime, you know, we get the shoulds, and it's definitely, I got should on, is that that should voice is coming from somewhere, psychologically, emotionally, and potentially spiritually.

And you know, as we're walking this conversation out, the nervousness of people in the Western world, evangelical Western world, is that this seems spooky, or we know lots of Christians who don't even believe in counseling.

And so we want to be a voice that honors counselors in the Christian world.

There was a mental health, you know, situation in my life back in college.

And I needed some help.

I was struggling with depression, and I needed medication, and I didn't want to take it.

And my perspective was, I want Jesus to be enough.

Jesus, I want Jesus to heal me, because if Jesus was enough in my life, then I'd be fine.

And finally, a dear brother finally looked at me one day and just said, Hey, can you have a question for you? 

And he knew my struggle.

I said, What's that? 

He goes, If you had diabetes, would you take insulin? 

I said, Yeah, of course.

He goes, So if you have chemical issues with your brain, why won't you take this medicine? 

And I was like, Oh, and so so, you know, for me in my own life, walking out both mental health professionals and prayer and total faith in Christ, there's that balance.

And so we again, we are affirming of and would recommend professional counseling for you to sort out your stuff in the mental health realm, because that's not what we do here.

Yeah.

And I think that counseling also offers the ability to the renewing and transforming of your mind.

Correct.

And all those, we were just talking about the screw tape letters.

And like going back, yeah, CS Lewis and talking about going back and like acknowledging where those messages are coming in that are negative and, and addressing them.

So let's do this.

Okay, so now we're talking about this concept.

So let's do a practical experiment here that you can do while you're listening, right? 

I'm so encouraged.

We have a dear friend in Dallas, and you're gonna listen, you're gonna know who you are.

And she just started because of the podcast, we hadn't even prayed with her one on one.

But we kept saying, Hey, just try this.

Hey, just try this.

And she went out and did it.

Right.

And in her group of friends, out of side of her paradigm, angels were descending into the room.

And transformation was happening with this group of moms because she just heard the podcast and tried it.

So powerful.

Unbelievable.

So kudos, dear friend, you know who you are.

And in that we are encouraged more to give more practical experiments that you can do alone at home, right? 

Keith and Megan Peeler have some gifting in this world.

It's our experience is what we want to do with our life.

But that doesn't mean that you have to have our gifting.

You do not.

These tools are for everyone.

The concepts are biblical, and the healing is for everyone.

Anyone and everyone can pray this way.

And so here's a way that we would do that.

So Megan's gonna be my little experiment here.

And so I'm gonna say, all right, here's how we would do this.

All right, so Holy Spirit, would you bless my wife now? 

Would you bless Megan and allow the power of your spirit to move in this time? 

And Holy Spirit, would you just wash her and allow the blood of Jesus Christ to cover her? 

That from the top of her head to the bottom of her feet, that that blood that washes and cleanses and sets her free and redeems her and overcomes death, that it would remind her just how deeply you love her.

And Father, as you pray, Holy Spirit, would you lead Megan? 

Megan, are there any little Magans there that want to talk? 

I've been working on my testimony that I'm sharing on Tuesday, and I am remembering parts of my childhood.

Yeah.

And I have been remembering me when I'm five years old.

Okay.

All right, so five-year-old Megan, can you hear my voice? 

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Five-year-old Megan, what's going on? 

My twin brother and I are going to kindergarten.

Mm-hmm.

And how are you feeling about that? 

I'm kind of mad because they won't put us in the same class.

And so Jesus, what do you want to say to little Megan as she's going to kindergarten? 

I feel like Jesus wants me to know that he's going to show me how to not be so connected and dependent on my brother.

Mm-hmm.

And that he'll be with me.

That's little Megan, as you're hearing that from Jesus, how does that make you feel? 

Comforted and a little bit more confident about going into this new class.

Sounds like you might still be a little bit nervous.

Are you still a little nervous? 

Yeah, because I don't know anyone yet.

And I said, Jesus, what do you want to show Megan about that nervousness? 

I think what I see is the adult version of me telling that little girl that you make a lot of really great friends.

Mm-hmm.

And so little Megan, as you hear from your adult Megan, how is that making you feel? 

Really excited because I have really good friends.

You like friends too, don't you? 

I'm an extreme extrovert, so yes.

I like people.

Yeah.

And so, Jesus, has there been anything tormenting or messing with Megan about this feeling or any of that stuff? 

Is there any spiritual garbage there, Jesus? 

I think I'm having, excuse me, a deeper level of the Lord showing me that I am not codependent, that I am not dependent on others, because that can be a negative thing when you don't know how to be alone.

And so, He's just showing me that I'm not.

So, I think there was growing up a spirit of codependency on people, friendships, brother, relationships, everyone, my mom.

And I feel like the Lord's showing me that I'm not.

Amen.

And so, in Jesus' name, if there's anything still attached, any deeper level stuff, any generational stuff that might be attached to that or lingering familiar thoughts or familiar spirits that are trying to attach to these memories or to influence Megan in any way, we just say, stop that.

You have no real authority here.

You have no power.

You have nothing over my wife and you know it.

And so, Holy Spirit, we just ask that as you continue to lead Megan, would you just minister to her heart and minister, Father, I'm asking specifically for her testimony that she's sharing, that you would just open the floodgates of truth, open the floodgates of vulnerability and allow the power of your spirit to move in Megan, because that's how you've made her, Father.

She is your instrument.

She is bold.

She is powerful.

She is beautiful.

She's filled with your spirit.

She is glorious in your creation because you made her.

And in the flesh, she may be broken, but Father, the way you made her DNA is to soar with the eagles.

And so, Father, move in her, allow her voice to be heard and to multiply it.

In Jesus' name.

Amen.

Amen.

Thanks, babe.

Yeah.

See, this is vulnerability, right? 

The Peelers are not afraid to be vulnerable.

There's always more.

It is.

And so, okay, so here's, like, let me unpack that, okay? 

So, here's what I did.

I was, as I was praying, I was asking one, the Holy Spirit, just to bring comfort and asking the blood of Jesus Christ to cover Megan, and that's all, right? 

Our scriptural understanding of what the blood of Jesus covers.

It's the atonement for our sin.

It covers all of our brokenness.

And as I did that, it was kind of like the preparation part, preparing Megan to just be comfortable and be at rest and to hear openly.

And then, I asked the Holy Spirit just to begin to lead that time.

All right.

All right, little Megan said, want to speak.

And then, Megan had the memory.

And so, then I'm just listening, right? 

I'm listening to her as she does that.

Now, you can do this by yourself, right? 

You can lay in your own bed, be in your own prayer closet or private time or whatever, and just ask the Lord to speak to you.

In fact, we were on our recent trip to Dallas, right? 

Got in an Uber to get to the airport.

That was so crazy.

And this lovely, young African American woman picks us up, and she says, this is vibrant and full of life.

And, oh, what do you guys do? 

And she's, I said, well, we're prayer ministers.

We have this inner healing prayer.

Oh, that sounds amazing.

I wish I could do that.

I said, well, let's just try something right now.

At 5 a.m.

in the morning, I don't even have coffee in my system.

I was like, I can't believe we're doing this right now.

Megan's looking at me in the backseat like, are you serious? 

Like, I'm not even awake.

You want to do this right now? 

And she's driving.

I mean, how safe is this? 

It was totally safe.

But here's the point.

Like, we want to take the mystical, fearful, this has to be big, it has to be heavy, it has to be fine demons.

It's, no.

Every bit of our inner healing prayer process is every bit of asking the Holy Spirit to lead us is about intimacy with God.

If it leads to some brokenness that has demonic activity to it, fine, we'll deal with that.

But that's insignificant compared to what Jesus wants to say to us, how He wants to heal us, how He wants to show us where He was in every single moment of our life.

And we're driving down the road and she's got her eyes open.

I said, all right, Holy Spirit.

I can't remember her name now.

I was called Karen.

Would you just show Karen right now? 

Holy Spirit, what do you want to, is there a memory you want to remind her of? 

And it was the same thing.

So when you're at home, you can do this sitting in your car.

I mean, if you're going to do, I would say actually, if you're going to do this for yourself, go park somewhere.

If you're in the car and sit still, don't do it 70 miles an hour, going down the highway.

But the point is that the process does not have to be heavy and big and huge.

It can be about how God is bringing you into the places of your life and your memories that are not yet redeemed by His presence.

Yeah.

And the helpful tool for Karen and the car, the Uber car, was that she had an active relationship with God.

Sure.

And so she knew God and God had been ministering to her, but there was a deeper, deeper level of healing that came to her from experiences she had had that when she got out of that car, she was glowing.

Yeah.

And she was so grateful and she was just so kind.

She's like, this has set my day up so great.

And it was amazing.

It was fun.

Yeah.

And we got to bless her, you know, because we were able to give her a big old fat tip because she just run this homeless ministry pantry and raising funds to do her own ministry.

It was awesome.

And that's the multiplying work.

That's what we want to be about at Everfree.

And so as you're doing this, you can simply say to God, okay, God, quiet my mind.

Holy Spirit, would You just fill me and allow my mind to be totally tuned into You.

Lord, would You just rid my mind and my heart of any distractions? 

And as I sit here before You, Holy Spirit, I don't want to be confused.

I don't want to make anything up.

And so I'm just going to trust You, Holy Spirit, that You will lead me.

It's the Holy Spirit.

Is there a place in my life that You want to bring me to? 

And then just have the patience to wait.

And you know what? 

If you get nervous about that, that's okay.

You know, our dear friend that we prayed with yesterday, that was her concern.

I just don't want to make anything up.

I just want to make sure I'm not making anything up.

And the first couple of times we prayed, we felt the same way.

And then we realized that there was a rhythm to this, that there was an active voice, that God's voice was actually speaking to us in these ways, and that we could trust that His voice was coming to us.

And we could identify when it was not the voice of God, but the voice of the enemy was bringing distraction and destruction and chaos and fear and all these different things.

And we could identify the difference between how our minds are processing information and how in prayer we're setting apart that time just to be one with God and that He can actually lead that time.

So as we're talking about this, any other thoughts on inner children or this idea babe that you want to do before we kind of wrap up things? 

I would just encourage you all to do it.

Yep.

Go try it out and see if the Lord ministers to you.

We would love to hear how it goes and what experiences you have, what roadblocks you come up against.

We'd also love to offer prayer to you if there are areas where you just feel like you can't go there by yourself and you need some encouragement and support.

And you can always go on everfree.us and schedule a prayer appointment with us and we would love to just minister to you in that way.

Absolutely.

And if you're new to that process, it's a two-hour time.

And what we do is that first 20 or so minutes, 30 minutes if we need it, we just spend time talking about how we're going to pray, what we're going to do, getting to know us, asking us questions, providing biblical references to kind of the ideas behind why we're praying and what we're doing and to make sure it's a new way of praying for a lot of people.

And sometimes when things are new, there's nervousness there.

So we just try to spend that time to help explain it.

And that way when you're entering into that period of time, you can feel good about what's going to happen.

And then we're available for follow-up afterward.

So yeah, like Megan said, go give it a shot.

Try it and let us know how it goes.

everfree.us, all of our contact information is there.

And we're so glad that you can be with us today.

Thanks for listening.

Bye-bye.

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Thanks so much for listening today.

Bye-bye.